Sometimes all you need is a little a blast from the past.
Yesterday I got an amazing opportunity that I have not had in about 12 years. My older brother, Ryan, his wife and baby boy have been in town for the last week. I don't get to see Ryan very often.
My mom drove my sister and her family up to PHX and staying the night. After saying good bye to everyone, we put on the football, blasted the country, cleaned the house, grilled, played some football in the dark with a glow in the dark football, took naps, played with the baby boy, and looked at old pictures.
We had no rules, no expectations, no pressures, we were free. Not saying that all the rules and expectation are bad and big, but it is nice to just hang out with my boys yesterday.
Michael Me Ryan
It was the original 4, with the addition of my brothers family.
Daddy, Ryan, Michael....my boys!
I think sometimes we forget to see how much we have all grown up.Sometimes we need to remember those dork hair cuts, and the crazy things we did. We are still alive, WE MADE IT, and we are just fine! Sometimes we need to talk about home much we all look alike and how we are different. We are related, can't change that.
Ryan Me Michael
Being with my men, all grown up, all mature, all have our own lives going on, can come together and still be GOOFY, can still LOVE each other, can still LAUGH, and talk about life TOGETHER.
I love that when I am with them I can be teased and pushed and punched and called out and laughed at and not care about anything. I love that these three boys have shaped and molded a little piece of my heart that will always be soft. You have made deep footprints.
Through all the crap we have all been through, individually, as brothers and sisters, or as a family, it puts the biggest smile on my face when I know we are still family. I am beyond lucky to have these three amazing men in my life.
Sometimes it hurts to go back into the past, to remember the good times and wish we still had them, or to see people we miss, to wish we were kids again, to remember the hard times, to see the sadness in someones eyes, to see times we will never get back. Sometimes family is hard to look back at, people pass away, people change, people get married, people make mistakes, people don't wake up and get their life on track, and it hurts. Family is a touchy subject, but these are the people who brought you into this world and got you to where you are now. No matter how much it hurts, it is family, and you can't pick your family.
Yesterday was a good healthy blast from the past, just being with my boys and getting a little freedom from something I didn't realize I was tied down to until I was free.
What is hold you down from freedom, expectation, pressures, labels, temptations, fears. The first step is to notice them.
Dad, Ryan and Michael thank you for everything you have brought to my life. I love you so incredibly much. :)