Stop, Look, Breathe...

We get so caught up in our daily lives; we miss all the beauty around us.

One of my favorite stories goes like this…

A little boy and his dad walk out to the car and on the way the little boy sees an old, dirty, yogurt carton. He stops to start playing with it. The father who is in a hurry, pulls on his sons arm saying “Come on, come on, we have to go, we are going to be late!” the son gives his Dad and sad look as if he just lost his favorite toy. The boy and father get in the car and the Dad says to his son, “Son I don’t want you playing with trash okay?” The boy responses with “Dad, I wasn’t playing with trash, there was a caterpillar in there.” The dad says “Really, how did you see it in there?” The boy replies “There is always something beautiful everywhere you look, you just have to look.” The father smiles and rubs his son’s head and sighs.

My schedule at camp is go go go. We don’t have much time to stop and look around at the beauty around us. I live on the beach and I surf during the sunset 4 days out of 7. I am lucky, but if I do not stop and look at it from more than twenty seconds, it passes me and I don’t get to let it sink in. This happens all the time. I surf with dolphins almost every other day, again if I do not stop and look at how cool it is instead of worrying about the next wave I want to catch, I would be a lot happier.

Life is about seeing the little things in life, which is where you will find your happiness. Like the way the grass feels, the clouds that are full and white, the child’s laughter, the color of the sand, the birds in the sky that chase each other, the sound the fire makes when it crackles, the feeling you get after arriving where you are meant to be after a long journey, the ants that are carrying the heaviest little cracker. These are just some of the things we tend to pass up.

The boy in the story stopped and noticed the beauty in the trash. There is always beauty in a city, no matter how busy it is, it is there. There is an overwhelming amount of beauty in the edge of the ocean, and I have a chance to live there for 10 weeks. I made a group of 14-year-old girls go on a jetty walk and after they all said that they liked it even though they thought they wouldn’t. I made them stop and look, and that is okay, sometimes we need to have people do that for us.

Go somewhere, get out and take in some fresh air. See the beauty that is all around you, and stop worrying about all the negative and all that you have to do.

Stop. Look. Breathe. 

The Onshore Break...

I got the chance to hang out with a 15 year old boy that had autism. Not too sever but you could definitely tell just by looking at him. Most people don’t know how to treat people, let alone children with special needs.

David laughed, cried, got upset when he took a hard fall, he made others laugh, and David NEVER stopped trying. He understood everything you said and if he didn’t he would be sure to ask you what something means. He would always be sure to come to me after a nice ride and tell me all about it. He knew what was safe and what wasn’t.

As the teens get the chance to go to San Onofre for a 4 day camping trip, they have to hike a board up and down a very large and steep hill twice a day if they wanted to, David did it every time. David is strong. He swim 2 miles everyday and bowls a game over 100pts every game for the Special Olympics. On the first night there was a very strong shore break at San O that was pretty scary. It was a very rocky beach and dropped off pretty quick. So the first 10 feet at all rocks that are sharp and lose then it gets sandy but by that times its easier to just swim. David rode a wave all the way in but at San O you want to bail out so you don’t have to get crush by the reforming wave to break on the shore. David didn’t get told that so he is having a blast the next minute I look over and he is getting crushed by the onshore breaks, and by the time you stand up wipe your eyes off you get hit by another. David was stuck. Hunter (our lifeguard) went out and pulled David all the way in and pretty much saved David. What Hunter did right was stop and explain to David what he should do, and not just say don’t do that. Hunter with great patience explained to David what exactly was going on and that green waves were so much better than white wash here. And before Hunter could finish he was starting to run out, David NEVER gave up. Later when David paddled out to tell me, he had the biggest smile and just laughed about it, and everyone else was able to see what not to do but also that if it does happen that it will be okay.

Who cares about onshore breaks and David getting crushed but if you think about it look at is as if the water was the world, or Satin, you were David, and Hunter was God. Some times we feel like we keep getting beat up, hurt, can’t stand up and the world or Satin just keep making you fall. Hunter came in when he knew that you couldn’t do it by yourself. David as suborn as he was let Hunter help him after a while, after David knew it was getting dangerous. God will come in and help you, you just have to have faith and keep trying until he does come. 

Why does David matter? Why am I telling you this? Because no matter what your condition is or what you have to deal with, whether it be a disability or some kind of physical restriction, a disease, or emotional disability, like depression or bi polar; you make matter and you make life what you want it to be. David never gives up. David finds the fun in the hardest of times. David can be you. David is not perfect and did have a melt down later that weekend about something small but we all do. But David tries.

Stop living in fear, and take some risks. Have patience with yourself, and have faith that the Lord will help you. 

Real Talk!

I have been working with 15 and 16 year old girls the last two weeks. We have done EVERYTHING together, and I absolutely adore it.

We have grown together, they respect me, they look up to me, they look at me for guidance. They all give me this look like 'You are absolutly ridiculous, but I love it because I can be just as goofy' kind of look. I have challenged them and pushed them physically and mentally, and they are finally see the differences in themselves because of it, so as much as they hate when I say they have 2 minutes to get ready for the next activity they thank me for making them rush so they can get the most out of what ever that next activity is.

Camp is a fun place to be, we all want a place to escape, even the counselors, it is so true. At our camp, we do not allow make-up, electronics, and don't tolerate negativity or bulling. Kids want a break from the drama, the same routine, the stress of different peer pressures, or practices they have to make. They get to literally put it all away. Escape. And everyone else is doing it too, so they are "different", more or less they are the same, and they love it. They literally do not have to worry about waking up an hour early just to get their hair done, instead they get up 15 minutes before and don't even want to shower every night. They are all doing it together and they are okay with it all. Camp gives them this safe place to just let go and goof off and try new crazy adventures that they may never get to take again.

Camp is a place to relax for them, and not take everything so serious. But they still have that crap inside them and it will never go away until they find someone they trust to tell things to. We are not counselors, we are camp counselors that take care of you. But we also are mentors and role models. A 4 year old age gap is a perfect gap. You can still relate to them, you can still have fun and you can give them enough advice that will help them, but not solve it for them, they still need to live their life. We aren't their best friends or someone to catch them but someone to listen and trust.

These girls need someone who they can trust and I won't give up, just because camp is suppose to be only fun and only an escape. They need an escape from all the people who don't care and who wont listen to them.

Camp for me has been about finding the balance between when to be serious and when to be goofy. These girls are at an age where they need someone to talk to, but they also need to escape. After 2 weeks and a camping trip in the middle, you get decently close to these girls. You know what pushes their buttons, they know who to annoy you, you get frustrated, and you laugh until you can't breath.

Tonight I got the chance to sit down and have a real talk with 6 out of 11 of my girls, the others were surfing. We talked about drugs, alcohol, boys, girls, high school drama, what they love about themselves and what they hate but most of all they just needed to know that they weren't the only ones who felt this way or that way. They needed to know that they matter and that everything that society tells them is impossible so stop trying. They just needed to know that it is okay to not want to go party all the time, but just hang out with their best friends. They wanted to know that someone not in their family or friend group could just listen to them, without judging them or telling them they were wrong.

THEY JUST NEEDED TO KNOW THAT THEY ARE LOVED NO MATTER WHAT!

Girls, YOU MATTER. High school is a tough time but you know what we talked about. Write it down and know that it will be okay, and that you are NOT alone. Find the hope. -Love your Mommy ;)

Serving Two Masters.

In our busy, crazy, emotional lives we tend to serve two masters and not even know it until you look at it from a different perspective, like a master. It could be an object, money, what we do, or even another person, usually a person we are very close to.

We can go to church, and praise the Lord, but we all know we can feel completely lost without really serving only Him. Sometimes we don't know what the problem is until you look at your life and ask yourself if you are putting more time into a person, thing, or action than you are putting into God and your relationship with Him.

"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." Matthew 6:24 


Again it does not have to be money, and most of the time it is not. 


So not that you have thought about what you spend more time doing rather than giving God that time, that conversation, that anger, that sadness, you stop and start doing so. 


This or what. Will one give you more power, pleasure or wealth, or will you find joy and peace in serving the Lord. 

The Importance of a Community.

I am working at a YMCA camp in San Diego, Imperial Beach, called YMCA Camp Surf. It has been very fun, challenging, learning many things, and coming to understand myself more.

I get to work with 13-16 year old girls who could be very wealthy or very poor. I work with girls who hate themselves and girls who have way too much confidence in themselves. I work with girls who say they can't until I or anther counselor shows them that they can. I work with sand and dirt, water temp that changes every other day sometimes. I work in gloomy mornings hot afternoons and cold nights. I work with men and women from all over the world, mainly Australia and the US. I work with camp food. I work with the sun, a lot, we have become great friends. I work with the unknown. I work with surface talk. I work with fear and the conquering fears. I work with pain, physically  and emotionally.

I think one of the scariest things I have worked with so far is not having the support system I have at school and home. This is not a Christian camp, that many people put to YMCA, actually they are not about Jesus at all. They have similar values, but no one talked about it at all. I have had a lot of trouble finding the comfort from the Lord, and being challenged by sisters of Christ. It has been very hard to even see God and all His beauty when no one else really see's it. It has been difficult to find His identity and not the approval from my girls or co-counselors. Not going to church is also very weird, not because it's church but because you have people around you that have the same core. When two or more are gathered He is there.

Without these things I am lost. I am depressed and not all there. My joy is missing. My compassion for others is careless. My mind things of things it shouldn't. I'm distracted. I feel alone. I feel not looked after. My heart has way too much room to run around and I have lost motivation to search for Him.

A community is important. Not having even one other person that you can go to with how your heart is doing and someone to keep you accountable with things is hard. Why do we even need people, He is everywhere and He is watching and can keep us accountable, so why would we need people to help us do these things. We are created to be social and to have a community to cry and laugh with us. The spirit is strong when two or more are gathered. A community is safe. Camp is safe but it is not really a community. A community is open. Camp is really not that open. A community is fun. Camp is fun but it is not joyful.

How do we find these people? When we are unsafe and insecure, well that's when we sometimes feel the Holy Spirit the most, because He is the only one who will keep us safe. So do we go out and ask people or do we slip it into a conversation? Sometimes its harder to find or create these conversations , merely because YMCA Camp Surf can not get too deep, and so everything is surface, and small talk. I think we all like to go deep but when someone or something is telling us how to act and think and speak it is hard to find the inner being of others and we loose own inner being.

A community is important to have real talks, joy, understanding, love, goofiness, selflessness, compassion, support, etc. These are the things we have to create sometimes if we can not find it.

You are taken care of!

Sometime we feel over looked, not important, forgotten. When we feel this way we sometimes doubt God, and ask or yell at Him asking Him "Where are you?!" and it seems like he doesn't hear us or answer us.

I just got back from San Francisco. I got to bike across the Golden Gate Bridge. We biked all the way to the Redwood Forest, which is not too far away. After a long bike ride we got to the hugest, oldest, prettiest Redwood forest. You look up and they just tower over you.

The Redwood forest is located on the Pacific Coast from central California to southern Oregon, lives up to 2,000 years, weigh up to 1.6 million pounds (730,000 kilograms), grow up to 367 feet (111.2 meters) tall, diameter up to 22 feet (6.7 meters), bark thickness up to 12 inches (30 centimeters), foliage is single, non-overlapping needles .5 to 1 inch long, reproduction by seed or sprout, tallest tree located in Redwood National and State Park, they are the tallest trees in North America.

Earlier I talked about how we feel small and over looked and even by God we may feel like this. As I looked up to the top of these trees, I thought, we think that we are not taken care of and He takes care of these trees and has taken care of these trees for hundreds of years. Why would we doubt that He is not going to take care of us.

It says in Psalms 139:13-18

For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  
 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well. 
 My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  
 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be. 
 How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand —
    when I awake, I am still with you.

HE THINKS OF YOU!

It also says...

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life"
 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.  Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."   Matt 6:25-36

He takes care of the birds and the flowers. He loves us more than the birds and the flowers, so
HE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.

You will grow tall. You will grow strong. You will grow with roots in the Lord if you take His gift of life. Be a Redwood tree, stand tall and do not worry.

Who do you follow?

Sometimes it feels like it is us versus the world. We get bombarded through the media with how we should look, think, and act. It is easy to loose who we are and what makes us joyful with these distraction.

We are easily put down, told we aren't good enough, we get jealous, lonely, angry and depressed. It is the world. The world is a dark place. In a previous blog I talked about how this is Satins playground, it is. We people please, we try and be "perfect" with the "perfect" life, the big house with three cars, with a good job. There is still more than this Earthly need, but we look at people are we tell ourselves that we aren't good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, but we are only comparing ourselves to other broken people.

We will continue to be depressed if we are following other broken people that look like that have it all together with a "perfect" life.

Why do you try to be someone who are aren't, they are already taken? Why is it so hard to follow the God of the universe that loves us to an infinite level and thinks about us more than the grains of sand on the beach?

Who is this God, who is Jesus Christ and why would we want to follow Him instead of people and the world?

 
God is all knowing...
"Great is our Lord and mighty in power;
    his understanding has no limit." (Psalm 147:5)

God is approachable...
"The Lord is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth." (Psalms 145:18)

God is creative...
"...where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth." (Psalms 121:1,2)

God is compassionate...
"As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him" (Psalm 103:13)

God is truthful...
 "-in the hope of eternal life, which God, who does not lie, promised before the beginning of time," (Titus 1:2)


God is NEVER changing...
"Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow." (James 1:17)

God is patient... 

The Lord is slow to anger but great in power;
    the Lord will not leave the guilty unpunished.
His way is in the whirlwind and the storm,
    and clouds are the dust of his feet. (Nahum 1:3)

Why wouldn't we want to follow someone that has these qualities?

WHO DO YOU FOLLOW?